I will assume that you're reading this article because you are suspicious that your man is unfaithful to you. According to the Institute for Family Studies in America, 20% of men will at some point during a relationship, cheat on their partner. It's sad that the percentage is that high. However, before you accuse your man of being part of this 20%, you need to be confident he has slept with someone else.
I have put together this article to help you identify if your man has slept with another woman or not. Of course, I hope these signs are not true for you with your man. But it is vital that you can notice if your man is sleeping with someone else, so you can then do something about it.
- 1 1. He smells different.
- 2 2. He comes home wearing different clothes than when he left.
- 3 3. He seems overly happy.
- 4 4. Sex is longer with him now.
- 5 5. He has less interest in having sex with you.
- 6 6. He acts differently when you are in bed together.
- 7 7. He spends way more time than usual on his phone.
- 8 8. He showers as soon as he gets home.
- 9 9. He has taken a sudden interest in his appearance.
- 10 10. He has evidence all over him of another woman.
- 11 Conclusion
1. He smells different.
This sounds like a bizarre first point, but it is one of the biggest reasons cheaters will get caught out. You will most likely know your partner's scent. Perhaps he has a specific cologne he uses, or you use a particular laundry detergent. So, it's a sure sign he has been with another woman if he walks into the house smelling of flowery perfume.
Similarly, if you notice that he comes home from his workday smelling like he's just hopped out a shower this is a cause for concern.
You have every right to ask why he smells so fresh or perfumed.
2. He comes home wearing different clothes than when he left.
This one is quite self-explanatory, and you don't have to be the world's greatest detective to try and figure this one out. If you notice that he comes home in different clothes than he left in, this could be a sign that he's been with someone else.
However, people that cheat are most likely compulsive liars, and they are good at it. Therefore, this will be a rare occurrence. They will have put together more of a plan. For example, if your partner says they're going to the gym after work, they will leave in their work clothes and come home in their gym clothes. There is nothing abnormal about this.
However, if you notice he is coming back without that post-workout glow or you see that a gym membership fee isn't leaving this account, then you might start to think where he is for an hour every night.
3. He seems overly happy.
Of course, something great could have happened at work or between you both, which would be a reasonable explanation. However, if you notice he comes off his “business phone call” with a massive smile on his face or sings in the shower more than usual, it could be because he is getting some action on the side. Let's be honest, who isn't happy after having sex?
You can simply ask something like, “Oh, you seem so happy. What happened?” and if he seems unable to come up with a reason or fumbles his words, it is probably because he's having sex with someone else behind your back.
4. Sex is longer with him now.
You will probably know your partner, sexually, pretty well. So, if you are confident that he has no problems usually with finishing when you have sex and all of a sudden, he can't, this can be a big concern. If he has just had sex with someone, then naturally he will take a lot longer to finish. There is too much pressure being put on him.
The same can be said for his stamina. Depending on how long you have been together, you will know roughly how long your lovemaking sessions last together. If for some reason, he is lasting a lot longer, one of the reasons can be that he has already used all his sexual stimulation before having sex with you.
It's important not to accuse him of cheating if this is the only sign, he is showing. Sexual dysfunction and problems in the bedroom can begin at any time and can come from nowhere. There might be a more severe health issue happening with your partner, so be supportive and communicate with them if this is a problem, and you can be confident that they are not cheating.
5. He has less interest in having sex with you.
Interest in sex will naturally decrease over specific periods of time for everyone, and there are many reasons for it. For example, after the ‘honeymoon period' of the relationship, you will probably start to have less sex – life kicks in, and suddenly you can't have sex three times a day!
Other reasons for his sexual interest to be low could be that he is overly tired or stressed. This is just the same as women after having a baby – your priority is not on getting laid; it's about sleeping.
However, if you are not aware of any reason, he could have for not wanting to have sex, it will be concerning if he doesn't seem interested at all. So, if you have noticed that his sexual desire for you is suspiciously low, then one of the conclusions that you can take from this is the fact he is getting his action from someone else.
6. He acts differently when you are in bed together.
If you're having sex and suddenly, he springs something new on you, it might be a welcome surprise. However, do you really think he's been reading Cosmo's tips on hotter sex? Or is he practicing these things with someone else? I think it's probably the latter.
A lot of the time, cheaters will also try to hide their infidelity by giving you more attention than usual, especially in the bedroom. They will try to deflect your suspicions by giving you the best sex of your life. But what they don't know is that we are already on to them.
In addition to this, a clear sign that he is sleeping with someone else is if he calls out someone else's name during sex with you. I feel like I don't need to explain any further. He literally imagines that you are someone else, and nothing can feel as awful as this can.
7. He spends way more time than usual on his phone.
If you feel like your man is attached to his phone at the moment, it could be a sign that he is talking to someone else on it. There are a few things you can look out for when it comes to your man's new phone habits.
Firstly, does he have a lot of incoming calls that he either declines or steps away from you to answer? Or does he have a new phone password? Perhaps he always puts his phone face down if it's near you to make sure you don't see any of the notifications that come up?
All of these are signs that he is speaking to someone else and probably cheating on you with them.
If you ask him who he's always talking to, and he is cheating on you, he will probably respond with “work.” This could be true, but you should ask yourself why work is not only private but why is his work calling him at midnight?
8. He showers as soon as he gets home.
Obviously, he might just be a seriously hygienic person who usually showers as soon as he gets home. If this is the case and none of the other signs in this article apply, I would dismiss it.
However, one of the most obvious signs that your husband is cheating on you will be the fact that he will shower as soon as he walks in. He probably won't speak to you or will try to avoid you until he's had a shower. He will be rushing to wash away the after-sex smell or the sweaty feminine scent he has on him.
To try and tell if he is showering to wash his infidelity away, try to stop him when he walks in the house. Don't run to him and accuse him. Just go to him and welcome him home. If you do this, not only will you be able to smell if he has been with someone else or see if he has marks on him, but you will be able to see if he is eager to run to the shower.
If he acts like he's in a rush to get to the shower and is dismissive of you, you have your answer.
9. He has taken a sudden interest in his appearance.
This might sound like something someone would do in a full-blown affair. Firstly – isn't having sex with someone else an affair? But also, it will prove that they are trying to look good for someone else.
Of course, it might not be too concerning if your partner is going for a couple of interviews or he wants to get fitter. However, if nothing in his life has changed or he hasn't mentioned anything about changing his appearance to you, then this could be a red flag.
If your man has started to spend a lot of time and effort trying to look good, it could be for someone else. Examples of this might be him joining a gym without mentioning it, buying new clothes or changing his style completely. If he goes out and buys a whole new selection of underwear when he doesn't need to, this can be concerning.
Something that might be a little more obvious than these other small changes in appearance is if he has started to pay a lot of attention to his grooming habits down in his nether regions. If your man is happy to go unshaven quite a lot of the time, and then suddenly decides to start shaving his pubic hair and making it look more appealing, this can be a big sign he's doing it for someone else.
So keep an eye out and if he's making changes to himself, ask him why. Remember not to interrogate him, because he might genuinely be making these changes to feel better about himself or look better for you.
10. He has evidence all over him of another woman.
This is obviously a complete giveaway that he has slept with someone else. There can be a lot of different types of evidence that another woman has been doing the dirty with your man. This ranges from a phone number being in his jacket pocket when you go to do the washing, to scratch marks all over his back. However, signs might even be as evident as you finding semen in his underwear.
It might be hard to find any secure evidence, as he will hide things away from you. But if you do find evidence, hang on to it so that when you confront him, he can't deny it.
What should you do?
I need to stress the fact that if you have not got secure evidence that your man has slept with another woman, don't go and accuse him. A healthy relationship is all about being supportive and communicating clearly with each other, so if you really do think that he might be cheating on you speak to him first.
You don't want to ruin your relationship by accusing your man over something that isn't true.
I am so sorry that you feel the pain and anxiety that your man might have slept with another woman. I think it's safe to say that we have all been there. However, I hope this article has helped you identify some of the signs your man could be showing if he is being unfaithful with someone else.
Whatever the outcome, everyone deserves a secure and robust relationship, and you need to know that you are so worthy of true love.
Did this article help you at all? If it did and you liked what you read, please let us know in the comments. We would love to hear from you.