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Has your boyfriend seemed distant? Are you constantly thinking “My boyfriend doesn’t talk to me” and feeling sad?
This is a normal occurrence in relationships, unfortunately. Fortunately, this means you’re not alone in this sadness and confusion. Lots of people experience this problem.
I put this topic together because I think that it’s a very important one. People don’t always know if or when they should talk to their boyfriend about things like this. They also don’t know when breakups are necessary and when they’re not.
SHOULD YOU BE WORRIED?
Even though I hate to say it, you should be worried if your boyfriend isn’t talking to you. This is true for a number of different reasons.
For one, you are in a relationship. He should want to talk to you and spend time with you. If he’s not doing this, he may not care about you or the relationship anymore.
You also might be concerned about the reasons he isn’t talking to you anymore. He might just need a break, but it could be something more serious. He might be hiding something from you, unfortunately.
It’s totally normal to be worried about your boyfriend’s lack of communication. It’s good that you noticed it and that you’re ready to take action.
You need to be aware of how worried you are about this. You don’t want to be too worried that you can’t think of anything else, but you do need to figure out what’s going on in the relationship.
Allow your concern to help you resolve the problems at hand and improve your relationship.
Communication is one of the most important pieces of a relationship. If the communication isn’t working, there will likely be other issues in the relationship. Watch this video to learn more about communication:
THINK ABOUT THE TIMING
Some girls get upset if their boyfriend doesn’t reply to their text within a few minutes. If this is your definition of your boyfriend not talking to you, you don’t really need to be concerned. He’s probably busy and doesn’t have time to text all day long.
It’s natural to want to talk to your boyfriend all the time, but you should understand that he has school and/or work to take care of. He might be taking a break from his phone to spend time with his family.
If your boyfriend seems to be genuinely ignoring you, there are bigger issues here. Evaluate how long he ignores you for and how often it is.
Your boyfriend may not reply for days at a time. This is a sign that something else is going on. This can be especially concerning if he usually responds quickly and suddenly stops.
Something serious might have happened in his family too. If you know that his parents are going through a divorce, your boyfriend might be dealing with that and might not feel like talking.
SHOULD YOU TALK TO YOUR BOYFRIEND?
You should absolutely attempt to talk to your boyfriend about this lack of communication. One major issue is that he won’t even talk to you. You don’t have very many options for contacting him, which makes things tricky.
If you can find a way to reach your boyfriend, you need to let him know how this is making you feel.
It’s totally unnecessary to give him the silent treatment in return. That move will put both of you in an even worse position. It might create conflict out of something minor too.
Though you should avoid texting your boyfriend non-stop, you should try reaching out to him and letting him know how you feel. For example, you could send him a text and explain that you really need to talk to him about this and that you are worried about him.
The key is to send him very few texts. If you send him too many, he will get annoyed and may ignore you for even longer.
WHY MIGHT HE NOT BE TALKING TO YOU?
Keep in mind that each person is different and has their own personal reasons for their actions. Your boyfriend may be ignoring you for one of the following reasons or for something completely different.
One possibility is that he is dealing with some personal issues. Maybe he got into a major fight with a friend. He might be experiencing some mental health challenges. School or work could be very busy and overwhelming.
He might also have some family difficulties. This might mean that he’s fighting with his parents. There could have been a death in the family.
Another possibility is that he’s mad at you. Did the two of you have an argument? Did you say something harsh to him?
There are lots of other reasons that your boyfriend might not be talking to you. You should consider these possibilities, but be aware that your boyfriend may have an entirely different situation going on.
HOW CAN YOU GET HIM TO TALK TO YOU?
If your boyfriend isn’t talking to you, it can be impossible to work things out. Even if you decide you just want to break up with him because of this, you still may not have a way to communicate that to him.
This can easily put you in a tricky place. If you’re trying to get your boyfriend to talk to you, you have a few options.
First, try giving him some space. Maybe he needs some time to think things over. Something could have happened personally that doesn’t affect you. He might be dealing with something private that he doesn’t want to talk about for some reason.
Second, stop texting him and calling him. I know you want to talk to him, but these phone calls are just going to upset him and might push him away from you.
Third, send him a text explaining why you need to talk to him. Now, I know I just said to stop texting him. This option here is more of a last resort. If you’ve given him a few days and he still won’t talk to you, you might want to text him and let him know you need to talk to him.
IS THIS A COMMON OCCURRENCE?
You should think about how often your boyfriend doesn’t talk to you. If this keeps happening, you should notice that he doesn’t have the best communication skills.
Though you shouldn’t set unrealistic expectations for your boyfriend, he should at least reply to you and talk to you. This doesn’t mean he needs to reply instantly every time you text him. This doesn’t mean you have to talk on the phone every night before bed.
If he continually goes through phases of ignoring you, there are bigger issues. You will have to spend some time working through these with him.
Maybe your boyfriend only stops talking to you every once in a while. He might have legitimate reasons for this. If he’s had a busy week, he may not always reply.
Simply evaluate how often this happens. If it’s happening too often, it definitely needs to be talked about and resolved.
If you are trying to improve your communication with your boyfriend, you should watch this video:
SHOULD YOU BREAK UP WITH HIM?
I don’t usually like suggesting a breakup. The problem is that so many people give up on relationships without even trying. Some people will get into one fight with their partner, call things off, and move on. This isn’t a great idea. Relationships require effort.
This doesn’t mean that there is no place for a breakup. There are definitely times when breakups are necessary. One of these situations is when there is a major lack of communication.
If you’re the only one who is trying to talk in the relationship, it may not be worth it to stick around. If you’ve tried everything to get your boyfriend to talk to you, you might want to move on.
Clearly, you should try to make the relationship work, if possible. Just realize that a breakup is a totally legitimate possibility, especially if your boyfriend won’t talk to you at all.
A relationship simply cannot work without your communication. If your boyfriend won’t even talk to you, this is even worse.
Unfortunately, in this case, you may need to break up with him. His lack of communication shows that he doesn’t care. Plus, it’s making you upset and just isn’t healthy.
If your boyfriend isn’t talking to you, you should be worried. Fortunately, there are ways to resolve the problem.
- Be sure to give your boyfriend some space.
- It’s okay to try to get ahold of him, but don’t send too many texts.
- Consider what family or personal issues your boyfriend might be dealing with.
- As a last resort, you may have to break up with your boyfriend due to a lack of communication.
Feel free to comment down below if you have any questions for us! We would be happy to answer them and help you out.
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr “Right” and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here…