Sometimes it can be confusing when people use the terms guy friend and boyfriend. Not everyone knows how to tell the difference between guy friend vs. boyfriend.
I put this topic together so that you would know exactly which term is the correct one to use for your situation. You won’t have to guess and end up using the wrong term, which could end up being pretty awkward!
Let’s take a look at the differences between a guy friend and a boyfriend.
The most common difference between a guy friend and a boyfriend is the attraction. If you have had a boyfriend before, think about how you were—or still are—attracted to him. This is called romantic attraction.
Romantic attraction basically means that you want to be with the other person romantically. It’s as plain and simple as that!
With a guy friend, this is totally different. You aren’t necessarily going to be attracted to your guy friend. You can think he’s a great guy and enjoy spending time with him. You just wouldn’t necessarily feel the attraction or date him.
Now, some girls do end up dating their guy friends so keep that in mind. If you do feel some romantic attraction toward your guy friend, you may want to date him in the future. This attraction alone doesn’t mean he’s your boyfriend though.
In general, though, romantic attraction is for a boyfriend. These are just the feelings that tell you that you want to be with this person.
If you do feel romantically attracted to a guy friend, maybe the two of you will date at some point down the road. You can be upfront about your emotions, but be careful in case things get awkward.
You probably want to spend time with your guy friend and you probably like talking to him. This is totally different from romantic attraction. In this case, you’re simply happy to be friends with someone and want to maintain that friendship.
Intentions are an important piece of any relationship or friendship. Without them, the people involved don’t always know what to expect from that interaction.
Each type of relationship or friendship comes with its own unique intentions. Think about why you wanted a boyfriend. You might have been attracted to him and wanted to have a long-term romantic relationship with him.
With your boyfriend, you will intend to be involved with him romantically. This might include flirting and more physical actions too.
Your own intentions for each relationship type will vary, but they probably follow the lines of what was just mentioned.
In a friendship with a guy friend, you’re likely just looking for someone to support you and to spend time with you. You likely enjoy spending time with that person already or noticed that you have similar interests.
When you get into a friendship or a relationship, it’s always a good idea to make the other person aware of your intentions. You want to avoid leading anyone on or causing any awkward confusion.
You might have to tell your guy friend that you just want to be friends. Sometimes, guys consider this to be “friendzoning”. This term basically means that the guy is stuck being friends with you instead of being able to date you.
Just know the differences between boyfriend intentions and guy friend intentions. You can specify these further in your own relationship or friendship to keep things going smoothly.
The Physical Side
It goes without saying that relationships are known for having some degree of physical contact. How far this ends up going depends on the relationship and the individuals’ beliefs.
In a friendship, physical contact doesn’t go very far at all. Usually, it starts and ends with hugging.
There is a term known as “friends with benefits” where friends engage in physical contact without being romantically involved.
You can tell the difference between a guy friend and a boyfriend by looking at how much physical contact the two of you have. If it’s a lot and it’s frequent, it’s more of a romantic relationship than a friendship.
Beyond that, you can also think about how much physical contact you want to have with the guy. If the guy is truly your guy friend, you might look at him as a brother. You wouldn’t want to do anything past hugging with your brother.
There is one exception to physical touch with a guy friend. If you and your guy friend are holding hands or snuggling up, it could be the start of a relationship. This is how some people start a relationship, just like they would begin flirting.
Physical touch is a good way to determine where you and your guy friend stand. If you feel like having more physical contact with him, it’s a good idea to talk to him about a relationship. Of course, make sure you have other reasons for wanting to date him.
Though you may hope to remain friends with your guy friend for a long time, this isn’t as certain as the future with your boyfriend.
Of course, you may not end up marrying your boyfriend either. A lot can happen before you would consider getting married. Still, it’s important to realize the different ways you might view each of these relationships.
In most cases, girls are going to make plans for the future including their boyfriend. The boyfriend is usually included because they’re in love and they hope to get married someday.
Because of this, girls tend to leave their guy friends out of the picture. This doesn’t mean that you don’t like your guy friends. Your boyfriend just has a bigger role in your future.
If you don’t have a boyfriend, you might include your guy friend in your dreams of the future. This could be a sign that you want to start dating him, but it’s not always true.
You might feel strongly about having your boyfriend in your future, or if the two of you talk about the future a lot. That’s one thing you don’t have in your friendship with your guy friend.
You may find yourself talking about the future with a guy friend and that’s okay. If you want your guy friend to be a part of your future, you might consider moving that friendship to the next level. Of course, you can remain friends in the future too!
As mentioned before, relationships can be intended to last far into the future. Many girls and guys are dreaming of getting married or living together forever.
This isn’t true of all relationships though. There are some that are more casual and short-term. Still, this is a good general way to tell the difference between a boyfriend and a guy friend.
You may be a committed friend who is supportive of your guy friend. This is totally normal and it’s actually really great! We can all use friends who are committed to the friendships we have!
For this purpose, we’re thinking about committed relationships and wanting to be romantically involved with someone for a long time.
When a relationship becomes serious and seems to be going smoothly, it may be considered a committed relationship.
Think about the level of commitment you have to this guy. If you feel somewhat committed, it could be a casual relationship or you might just be friends.
If you feel strongly committed and like you’ll be together for a while, it’s likely a more serious relationship.
This video explains commitment in a relationship:
The feelings you have for your guy friend are way different than the ones you will have for a boyfriend.
You should know the difference between these feelings. They will look a little bit different for everyone based on how you tend to experience each of the unique feelings.
One exception is that you might like your guy friend and want to date him. Then you would feel similar emotions to what you would feel toward a boyfriend.
In most cases, any romantic feelings that you might have will be for your boyfriend or a crush.
Think about your past relationships if you have been in one. These feelings are usually warm and exciting. You might even get butterflies. Everyone feels these things in a unique way and you know yourself best.
When you have a close guy friend who you know and trust, you might stop caring about what your hair looks like and if you’re wearing makeup. You know that your guy friend isn’t paying attention to that.
With a boyfriend, it’s different. You may find yourself dressing up for a casual date or putting makeup on in case you run into him at the grocery store.
When girls have boyfriends, they want to impress them. They want to make sure that their boyfriends know they’re attractive.
This doesn’t mean that you can’t be attractive without putting in the effort. It’s just that, in general, a girl will want to look better for her boyfriend than she will a guy friend.
Part of this is because of the attraction you have for your boyfriend. You want to make sure he feels that same attraction toward you.
The things you talk about with your boyfriend vs. your guy friend are going to be pretty different. There may be some overlap depending on your personal situation. Remember that there are some exceptions for your own unique relationship.
In most cases, girls will talk to their guy friends about nearly anything. They see their guy friends as brothers and feel like they can be pretty close to them. They don’t have a lot to hide and just want to be honest.
Plus, guy friends are usually supportive and encouraging so they can offer advice when you need it.
Your guy friend should know you pretty well and know what you’re going through. In my experience, my guy friends have always been very helpful.
Depending on your relationship, you and your boyfriend may be able to talk about nearly anything too. It simply depends on the dynamics of the relationship.
At the beginning of a romantic relationship, your conversations may be flirtier and more about the relationship. You might talk about yourself and ask him questions to learn more about him.
Later on, you might have deeper and more personal talks with your boyfriend. There can come a point where you talk about anything and everything. This is totally normal and healthy! It just usually takes some time to get there.
When it comes to conversations, most girls find it easier to talk to their guy friends instead of their boyfriends. This is a good way to tell the difference between the two.
When you first start dating a guy, you may not be totally comfortable with him. You might be a little bit shy or intimidated. You’re obviously attracted to him and you really want this to work out. It’s totally normal to be uncomfortable at first!
You might be nervous when you first start talking to a new guy friend, but it’s usually much less intense. It might just be a little bit of nervousness about meeting a new person.
When you continue getting to know your guy friend, you should become more comfortable. This goes along with how much effort you put into your appearance before you see him or what types of conversations you have.
Eventually, in your relationship, you should start to feel more comfortable and like you can be yourself.
Did you enjoy this list? If so, be sure to share it with a friend!
This topic is important to me because I want you to be aware of these differences and how to know what type of relationship you are in. Being confused is frustrating and can make it tricky to
Feel free to leave a comment down below and share your thoughts with us.
A hopeless romantic that struggled for many years to find her Mr “Right” and made all the mistakes you could think of while dating. Known for always choosing the wrong guys or messing up relationships, Sonya was finally able to change her approach and mindset when it came to dating which helped her eventually find the man of her dreams and become happily married. You can read more about me here…