Phones have become more and more attached to us over the year and we are all guilty of spending too much time on them. However, if your partner is paying more attention to their phone than they are to you, it can really make you feel like you feel worthless. Has it got to the point that them scrolling through social media aimlessly is more important than holding a conversation with you?
You might think that it means they could be speaking to someone else, and that’s why they are so interested in their cell. Of course, this could be true, but you don’t need to jump to that conclusion first. There are many reasons for your partner always being on their phone. This article is here to help you understand why your man is spending so much time on his phone, and how you can change that.
- 1 1. He could be speaking to someone else.
- 2 2. He could have serious work commitments.
- 3 3. He could actually have an addiction to his phone.
- 4 What should you do about the problem?
- 5 Conclusion
1. He could be speaking to someone else.
This is probably the first conclusion you will come to if your significant other’s time is being taken up by his phone, so let’s tackle this first. He could be speaking to someone else.
However, there is a big difference in the behaviors of someone who is cheating on you, and someone who just can’t stop using their phone to do or look at meaningless things.
If you really are concerned that he is speaking to someone else, have a look at the signs below and see if any of them are true. If the signs do sound true, it’s probably time to start investigating more.
– He is overprotective of his phone.
If your boyfriend or husband is cheating on you and speaking to someone else, it is unlikely that he will casually sit opposite you while he is texting his new woman. If you notice that your man is suddenly acting protective over his phone, it might be because he has something to hide from you.
– He takes his phone calls away from you.
If you notice that your man is always walking away from you to take his phone calls or declining incoming calls when you are around, this could be a red flag that he’s speaking to someone else. He doesn’t want you to hear what they are speaking about or know who he is speaking to.
– If you ask about who he is talking to on his phone, he fumbles and acts shady.
If you do notice that your man is using his phone a lot, it is a normal reaction to ask him what he’s doing or who he is talking to. If he has nothing to hide, then he will be happy to tell you what he is up to. However, if he acts shady or doesn’t give you an answer straight away, he is hiding something from you, and you have every right to worry about that.
2. He could have serious work commitments.
A lot of people use their phones regularly for work. This will be the case especially if your husband or boyfriend always needs to be contacted by his colleagues or boss. Another situation where your partner might be using his phone a lot for work is if he has just started a business or freelance work. He will need to be in constant contact with clients.
This can’t really be helped, and you should be supportive of your partner if they are working so hard. You should try to be as understanding as possible in this situation, even if you might feel like you are less of a priority to him.
In addition to this, your man might work so hard normally, that when he has free time, he won’t just be trying to catch up with you. He will also be trying to catch up with all of his friends and family. Once again, you do have to understand this to a certain point. However, if you feel like he is spending more time talking with his friends on his cell phone rather than speaking to you in real life, this can hurt. A good idea to combat this could be suggesting for the both of you to go and meet his friends or family. Therefore, he can catch up with everyone, in real life, at the same time.
Another idea to try and combat the amount of time your man spends on the phone might be to try and involve yourself in his work or business. You can offer to help share the virtual workload to ease the time that he must spend on his phone or online. This will not only help him, but it will probably bring the two of you closer because you will be working together.
3. He could actually have an addiction to his phone.
According to the American Addiction Centre, even though smartphone addiction is not yet listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders research has compared it to gambling addiction. Your partner could genuinely be addicted to using their phone.
If you are sure that they are not using their phone to speak to anyone else and they don’t need it for work, this could be why they are always on it. If you find them aimlessly scrolling through social media or playing games, it could seem like a good thing – what they are doing is harmless. However, it can still hurt if they are more interested in something trivial than they are with you.
I have listed some questions below that are indicators of cell phone addiction. So, if you realize that some of the signs ring true for your man, it could be a good idea to talk to him about how much he uses it phone and tell him how unhealthy it can be.
- Does has always check his phone, even if no notifications are coming up?
- Is he too focused on his phone to see what is happening around him?
- Does he get angry when you ask him to get off his phone?
- Does he not realize how long is spending on his phone? Does he lose track of time?
What should you do about the problem?
The first thing you should do is communicate with your man.
Tell him how it makes you feel that he spends so much time on his phone. If you are really honest with him and express the pain that he is causing you, he might realize how much it is affecting you.
With all men, it is best not to accuse them. So, instead of telling him what he’s doing wrong, just tell him how he is making you feel. At the end of the day, he is your man and he should want to make you happy.
Secondly, you could both make sure you have times in the day that are phone free. Sit down together and talk about what the times are that you both spend the most time on your phones. For example, a lot of people will look at their phones as soon as they wake up in the morning. For others, it might be that they spend too much time when they are going out for dinner on their phone.
If you create phone-free time, you will be able to both just focus on each other with no distractions.
Finally, there are several things you can use on your phones to make sure you are spending less time on them. For example, on iPhones now, you can set time limits on apps that cut you off from using them after a certain amount of time.
As well as this, at the end of every week on apple devices, it will also give you a report on how much time you have spent on your phone. I am sure there is a similar thing for android phones or apps you can download to keep track of this.
You could challenge your partner and see who can spend the least amount of time on their phone during the week. If you make it a competition, he will feel less like you are attacking him. A really good way of combating the time that he spends on his phone will be to try and spend less time on your phone too. Make it less of a negative and more of a positive.
As much as using our phones is something all of us do, it’s so important to make sure it isn’t putting our relationships in danger. Therefore, I really hope that this article has helped you if you are suffering from a lack of attention due to your partner spending too much time on their cell phone.
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